So I had this gut feeling, the only reason he continued talking to me, was to make sure of something. And when he was finally satisfied with the answer, he doesn't need to talk to me anymore.

He kept asking that question. At every conversation. I brushed it off knowing he was paranoid person. But I already felt like once he got his answer there is no need for more.

He got his answer, and now there is no need for more. Could be that or he is really busy burying his face in his books. Or he got into an accident. Either way I hope he is doing great.

So I've decided, to use my forgetfulness as an advantage this time. Usually I hate the fact I'm forgetful because people will assume I don't care enough to remember or I don't listen. Trust me I listen and I try so hard to remember, and can tell Nellie is annoyed with this habit but she loves me non the less. I hate annoying people, which is why I hate the fact I'm forgetful. And yet, who knew it would come in handy. I've decided to forget I ever fell in love. Pretend it didn't happen. Would be easier to literally live and forget.

I'll always love him because he is my first love. And nothing will change that. But I also can't let it stop me.